Saturday, September 25, 2010

Patience is a Virtue. . .

For someone with my personality, patience is one of the things I struggle with the most. Not patience with others, but more patience when waiting for things to happen or in this case, waiting for injuries to heal. I want to get back in the game ASAP even though logic is telling me that I need to take it easy for a few days. . .

On Tuesday I was doing a WOD that involved a lot of Hang Power Snatches at 65 lbs. To me, this weight felt heavy, but definitely not unmanagable. Unfortunately though, as fatigue set in I started to let my form slip and as a result I tweaked a muscle in my back on one of the very last reps. Throughout the rest of the day my back got tighter and tigher as it continued to spasm every time I'd move a certain way, so I decided to give it a few days off. I've been keeping ice on it taking anti-inflammatories to help with the swelling. It's feeling much better, but not quite 100% just yet.

The "smart/logical" side of my brain is telling me that I need to just chill out for a few more days and let it heal completely before resuming my training. I know that if I go back too soon I will prolong the healing time and it could turn into a nagging injury that holds me back for months. Unfortunately, the "other" side of my brain is less logical and feels like I'm losing ground every single day that I don't train!

Fortunately my wonderful husband is my voice of reason, and every time I say "well maybe I'll just do something light" he threatens to chain me to the furniture and reminds me that I will make a lot more progress if I wait just another few days and go back at it when I'm 100%.

So good luck to all the CrossFitters out there doing Fight Gone Bad today! I'll be cheering you on from my couch . . . patiently!

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Where Does All of the TIME Go??

I recently received the following question through email, and thought that I’d answer it in a blog post because I think it involves a topic that a lot of people (myself included) struggle with!

Hi Christie, I have read your blog and what you blogged on Whole9. My goal is to get in shape before I turn 30 - the only thing I seem to be having a problem with is Time. I am currently in Chiropractic College and it takes up all of my time. Do you have any advice?

Unfortunately, I know that much of the all of us end up feeling that there just aren’t enough hours in the day. We all have different things that require our time (spouses and children, work, school, workouts, cooking, grocery shopping, cleaning, household chores, etc). . . it can be a bit intimidating to consider adding anything to our already full plates! Then we read Robb’s great new book “The Paleo Solution”, and realize that we’re “cock-blocking our fat loss efforts” (his words!) if we’re not getting a minimum of 8 hours of sleep a night . . . REALLY Robb??? But I’m different, right? I’m fine on 6 hours, right? Apparently . . . well . . . .NO!!! I’m not. And neither are you.

So what do we do?

Do we give up on trying to eat right and hit up Mickey D’s for breakfast, lunch, and dinner (hey, it’s quick, cheap, and easy, right??)

Or do we take the time to cook nice healthy meals at the expense of letting our workout time slide into never-never land?

Or do we ignore our schoolwork and procrastinate constantly, stressing ourselves out of our minds at the last minute to finish assignments with all-nighters because we HAVE to fit in our workout and meal preparation at all costs?

Or maybe we call our bosses and tell them that we’ll be working 5 hour days from now on because time spent in the office has fallen below time spent in the gym and in the kitchen and catching our Zzz’s on our own personal prioritization scales.

Seriously – these are some of the options that have run through my mind, even if only in a sarcastically joking self-speak kind of way. I mean, what in the heck ARE we supposed to do when we run out of hours in the day? Where do we draw the line, and how are we expected to set priorities when EVERYTHING is a non-negotiable priority?

Here are a few things that I’ve done in the past that resulted in an epic FAIL:
  • I’ve prioritized my health (workouts and meal prep) over my schoolwork. I procrastinated to epic lengths only to find myself pulling all-nighters out of my butt in order to meet my deadlines. The result? Cortisol levels THROUGH THE ROOF due to lack of sleep, and the extreme amount of pressure resulting from the rapidly approaching deadline. I ended up turning in a poor quality paper with weak references because let’s face it – no one does their BEST work when they’re sleep deprived and stressed to the max. Then after turning the paper in, it took me at least a week to get my sleep schedule straightened back out. . .not fun at all. I was a big hot mess.

  • I’ve sacrificed “healthy eating” in order to make some extra time in my day. When I didn’t have to plan or prepare meals or go grocery shopping, it freed up an average of 1-2 hours a day and more on the weekends. For about 3 months, my diet consisted of primarily fast food. Really. It started innocently enough with a Subway salad . . . then I graduated to daily Subway Subs. Then I started adding the obligatory Cookie. Before I knew it, I was eating Big Macs, Bean Burritos and DQ Blizzards for Lunch and Dinner, and skipping breakfast most days. They’re not kidding when they say that fast food is addictive. I justified this in my mind by working out harder. I was religious about my workouts and for a little while I maintained my weight. The first thing that I noticed was that my workout performance and strength started to decrease. . then the jeans got tight. . then I couldn’t button the jeans. . . that was the last straw for me. Whole30 to the rescue and by the grace of God I was able to turn it around. But not without a lot of work and willpower!

  • I’ve sacrificed sleep so that I can fit in everything else. M – F I’d get up at 4:45am for my MetCon at the gym. Then off to work. I’d squeeze my Oly Lifting in on my lunch break, and then head back to the gym to help coach classes in the evenings. I’d walk in the door at 7pm, and cook dinner. I’d end up eating around 8pm which made going to bed before 10 or 11pm an absolute impossibility. After a few months of this the sleep deprivation really started to catch up to me.

Through trial and error, I’ve found that the only thing that really works for me is prioritization, pre-planning, and refusing to over-commit myself. I have found that when I’m able to “control” the Workout and Eating Right parts of my life, everything else kind of falls into place. When I start to lose control of my “routine and schedule” surrounding workouts and meal prep, everything else spins hopelessly out of control as well. Maybe it’s just me, but it seems to happen like this Every Single Time.

So here’s some time-management steps that I have found helped me when trying to squeeze everything in. I know that these won’t apply to everyone, but hopefully they help at least one or two people de-stress their lives just a little! Life is too short not to enjoy every minute of it!
  • Put ME first, and don’t over-commit – I know this sounds selfish, but it’s got to be done if I want to maintain my sanity. I had to look at my life, evaluate which of my responsibilities/commitments I absolutely had to do, and which ones I could cut out or scale back without the world coming to an end.
  • Consider cutting back on your workouts – you may just be overtraining! If you’re always feeling tired and run-down and begin to get the point that you’re not looking forward to every single workout, it may be a good idea to cut a day or two out and see how your body reacts. This will free up more of your valuable time for other stuff too!

  • Plan Ahead – Schedule/Plan your meals and time commitments a week in advance. I sit down every Sunday Morning and figure out what I’m cooking for lunch/dinner for the entire next week (breakfasts are usually left-overs). Then, I make a grocery list from my meal plan and walk through the house to make sure I add any other things like toiletries, cleaning supplies, and dog food to the list. There is nothing that is a bigger waste of time than making multiple trips to the grocery store in a single week because you forgot “one thing” that you must have. After I’ve planned my meals and made the grocery list, I pencil out a daily schedule for the week. I write in MetCon times, Oly Lifting times, Meal Prep Times, Work hours, Coaching Hours, SLEEP HOURS, Famiy time, grocery shopping time, and any additional commitments that I have that particular week. Some weeks I have more commitments than others, and I can see from the start that I won’t be able to fit in everything. So I cut out a workout or two or maybe reduce family time by an hour one day in order to make everything fit in. By planning out my schedule at the start of the week, I don’t feel stressed mid-week when I’m trying to cram everything in and just run out of hours in a day. Missing a workout every now and then (and scheduling it that way!) is not going to be as detrimental to my health as running myself into the ground.
  • Take advantage of left-overs! I cook for 2, however most meals that I make, I scale up to serve at least 4. This way I can use leftovers for breakfasts and lunches and often only end up having to physically prepare one meal per day.
  • Make the Crock-Pot your best friend! CrockPot cooking is healthy because it slowly cooks the meat and the meat is not exposed to much air during cooking. This reduces the oxidation and the amount of free-radicals created by cooking meat! Not only is it healthy, but it’s such a big time saver. . . and most crock-pot meals are big enough to feed my husband and I at least twice! There are a million recipes out there on the internet, so just plug in a Google search for “Paleo Crock-Pot Recipe” and let the internet work it’s magic! Since I’m talking about time-saving tips – they make these things called “crock-pot liners”. They are made by Reynolds, I think. They’re great, and significantly reduce the cleanup time!
  • Dedicate a block of 2-3 hours at least once a week for “Food Prep”. My block of time is usually on Sunday night. During this time period, I make the following:

    PWO Sweet Potato/Egg White Puffs
    Spinach “Muffins”• Big Vat of Guacamole
    • Hard Boiled Omega-3 Eggs
    • I bake a pan of chicken tenders with whatever spices I’m “feeling” at the moment
    • I cook one lb of GrassFed Ground Beef
    • I Dice/Chop lots of veggies for use in meals during the week: Broccoli, Cauliflower, Carrots, Celery, Jicama
    The preparation of these items sets me up for the week with:

  • • My PWO Meals (Sweet Potato Egg Puffs)
    • a handy veggie snack that I can just grab and go with or add to a breakfast/lunch/dinner that’s a little low on the green stuff (Spinach Muffins)
    • Guacamole which I use as a snack (dip carrots or Jicama in it), and on my eggs in the morning, and on salads at lunch, and sometimes I’ll even slather some on a chicken tender for an in-between-meal fix.
    • Hard Boiled Eggs (O3 Variety) which are a great protein/fat source – I’ll add them to salads or just grab one with a chicken tender and a spinach muffin or 2 for a quick meal on the go,
    • Chicken Tenders which are a great protein source that I can grab on the go or add to salads, or serve as lunch or dinner in a pinch w/ a bag of veggies steamed in the microwave.
    • GF Ground Meat – I’ll mix this with some Guac and throw it on a salad (or eat it right out of the bowl), or I’ll sauté it for a quick moment with some broccoli slaw and a poached egg for a quick and easy breakfast.
  • Take advantage of Pre-Cut Veggies – I L-O-V-E Broccoli Slaw!! It’s just fresh shredded broccoli hearts, cabbage and carrots in a bag. This stuff is SUCH a timesaver. I use it all the time to add veggies to my breakfast (just throw it in a skillet for a moment and top w/ a poached egg or two and some avocado). It also makes a really quick skillet meal or dinner – in literally less than 10 minutes. Throw it in a skillet w/ a meat and seasoning of your choice – cook until the meat is done, and that’s it!
Well, that’s all the tips I have off the top of my head, but hopefully that helps! I’m not in school any more, but I do remember how stressful things were when I was trying to juggle my coursework along with a full time job, family time, and a healthy fitness/eating plan. At the end of the day, you’ve just got to do the best that you can, and not beat yourself up if you fall a little bit short every now and then. But seriously – preparation and planning is the key! A few hours on a Sunday prepping some basic stuff saves me HOURS of work and an unlimited amount of stress and lost sleep during the week.

Good Luck!

Monday, September 20, 2010

Portable PWO Paleo Egg & Sweet Potato Puffs (& Spinach "Muffins")

Portable PWO Paleo Egg & Sweet Potato "Puffs"

Here's another "Christie Original Recipe" . . . try at your own risk! Just Kidding - this one's REALLY good! One of the only things that I have found myself "missing" since going 100% Paleo was the ease and portability of my PWO Shake. I have been making mashed sweet potatoes, and getting organic and low sodium sliced deli turkey, and taking a thick slice of turkey with about 2-3 oz of sweet potatoes as a PWO meal. (I would roll up the sweet potato in the piece of turkey and chow down!) This is pretty yummy, easy, and portable, but I wanted to get away from the processed deli meat. I liked the idea of egg whites and sweet potatoes, but wanted something a little more portable than scrambled whites. . .hence my creation!

These are soooo Good, Super Easy - a great combination for me!


1 Medium Sweet Potato (around 14oz worked for me)
15 Egg Whites
Sea Salt


  1. Peel and dice Sweeet Potato into fairly small cubes
  2. Put SP in a skillet sprayed w/ a little Pam (I usually use olive oil or coconut oil to grease my pans, but want to keep my PWO meal as low in fat as possible, hence the Pam)
  3. Sprinkle w/ Cinamon and Sea Salt to taste
  4. Cover and cook about 5 minutes, stirring a few times (just long enough to soften the potatoes up a little - you don't want them "mushy")
  5. Distribute SP Cubes evenly between 12 deep-ish muffin pan holes
  6. Beat 15 egg whites together until they are a little frothy
  7. Pour egg whites evenly over the SP cubes in the 12 muffin pan holes
  8. Place in Oven at 350 and cook about 20 minutes
  9. Pull out of oven and turn pan upside down onto cooling rack
  10. Let cool completely before placing in fridge (If you don't let them cool completely, they'll get mushy and soggy)
I store mine in a tupperware container stacked on top of each other. Each morning, I grab two "puffs" to take with me to the gym, and put them in a ziplock bag. I've found that storing all of them in a ziplock bag in the fridge makes them go soggy and mushy too.

One additional note - these will "shrink" a little once they've cooled, but if they are cooked long enough, they won't shrink too much. The combined pics at the top of the post are of a "puff" after having been refrigerated overnight.

Easy Portable Spinach "Muffins"

On to another awesome portable recipe that I stumbled across this weekend: Spinach "Muffins"!
I'm including this recipe in the same post because I found that it was easy to prepare these at the same time as my PWO Puffs, and I could even cook them together in the oven. The inspiration for these came from Melissa Joulwan's recipe here, and I just made some edits (including entire egg rather than just whites, and using some different spices, and changing quantities up a bit).


4 Omega-3 Eggs (yes, yummy yolks and all!!)
4 9oz bags/boxes of frozen spinach
3 Cloves Garlic, Minced
1-2 Tb Italian Spice Blend (or your own blend of oregano, basil, etc)**
1 tsp Garlic Powder**
1 tsp Onion Powder**
Sea Salt to taste
Red Pepper Flakes to taste (if you like spicy stuff)

  1. Defrost spinach in microwave
  2. While Spinach is defrosting, beat your eggs well
  3. Drain Spinach REALLY WELL!! (I like Melissa's tip of cutting a small hole in the corner of the bag, and then squeezing it like your life depends on it until you can't get any more water out)
  4. Dump Spinach into a bowl and stir in minced garlic & spices/seasonings to taste**
  5. Add Beaten Eggs to Spinach, and mix well
  6. Spoon evenly into 12 muffin pan holes, and pack down a bit
  7. Bake in the oven at 350 for 30-35 minutes. (I baked mine right alongside my PWO Puffs, and just pulled my puffs out about 10-15 minutes before my Spinach Muffins)
  8. Pull out of oven and turn pan upside down onto a cooling rack so that "muffins" can cool.

**Note - I don't really measure my spices most of the time - I just use the sprinkle - taste - sprinkle - taste method. . so the measurements above are guesstimates (although I think pretty close to what I used)- you should tailor them to your own tastes.

These will "deflate" a little as well, but not much if they are cooked well enough. The final pic is of one of my "muffins" after a night in the fridge. These are REALLY YUMMY straight out of the fridge! I had one this morning with a handful of raw almonds at 5am on my way out the door got my WOD on. I usually don't eat before my workout (it's just so dang EARLY!!), but this sat really well with me and it seemed that I had a bit more energy to get through the WOD. These definitely will be a new staple in my fridge!

And on a side note - I have NEVER been a fan of frozen spinach. I love fresh baby spinach in a salad or wilted under some meat, but I just haven't ever been able to stomach the frozen stuff. . I think it must be a consistancy thing. . but I really, really liked these, so give them a try even if you're not a fan of the frozen stuff - I think that they'll pleasantly suprise you!

Well, that's it! If you try either of these, and love (or hate) them, or have suggestions of revisions that would make them even yummier, please leave a comment and let me know!

Friday, September 17, 2010

The Best Thing since Sliced Bread!!

Portobella Mushroom "BUNS"!!!

I have my friend and fellow CrossFitter / Whole30 Participant Monique (AKA DLQ!!) to thank for this one. . . .

It was labor day weekend, and I was feeling sorry for myself b/c I was on quarentine while everyone else was out enjoying the beautiful weather, BBQs and Beaches. . . I couldn't work out or do anything to burn off some frustration, but I decided rather than resign myself to being in a crappy mood all day long, I'd spend my time as productively as I could around the house. I'd already cleaned the house and done the laundry, so I decided to get a little bit creative in the kitchen :)

Since all I could think about was going to a Labor Day BBQ, I figured I'd bring the LD BBQ to me! I searched the web for a good burger recipe and ended up taking a little bit from a few different recipes. I don't remember exact measurements, but my burgers were made of:

GrassFed Ground Beef
Finely Minced Scallions
Finely Minced Garlic
Shredded Carrots
An egg or two
Almond Meal (just a little to hold them together)

I combined these ingredients, formed them into patties, and grilled them to perfection . .

Then, I made the Guacamole from the recipe on the Whole9 website (OMG - SO GOOD!) and sliced up some beautiful home grown tomatoes that I'd purchased at the Farmer's Market.

Monique had mentioned earlier in the week that she'd used Portobella Mushroom Caps as "buns" for a burger, so I gave it a shot. I flash grilled them, and proceeded to create my burger by layering 1 mushroom cap, a burger patty, a HEALTHY serving of Guac, Tomatoes, and then another Mushroom Cap.

On the side, I fixed what we call "BS French Fries" at my house (Basically just roasted brussel sprouts). To make these, I needed:

1 bag of fresh brussel sprouts
Olive Oil
Sea Salt, Pepper, and Garlic Powder to taste.

I cut the little stems off each brussel sprout, peeled off the loose leaves, and sliced each one in half (or quarters if they're the monster brussel sprouts that we sometimes get down here in TX). Then, I tossed them in a big ziplock bag w/ olive oil, sea salt, pepper, and garlic powder. Shook them up really well to coat evenly, and the prep is done! I then put them cut side up on the top rack in my oven at 450 degrees, and cook them about 15 minutes give or take a few. I pull them out when they're just starting to brown up and get crispy around the edges.

We call them BS French Fries because they actually taste a little similar to french fries (at least in my perverted paleo-fied mind!) They are good!

This meal turned my mood right around :) There's nothing like a big fat juicy burger to put a smile on a girl's face!

Monday, September 13, 2010

Quick Update & My Experience w/ 100% Cacao

Wow - I didn't mean to go so long in between blog posts. . . it's been a crazy few weeks in the Tracy household!

I've been having thyroid issues for a long while now, but it took my Dr. forever to agree to refer me to an endocrinologist . . . long story short, I finally got the referral and the treatment that I needed :) I went in for Thyroid Radiation Therapy last week. . . the treatment itself was a piece of cake, but I was on "quarantine" for a full week after the treatment - and that sucked! They told me that I wasn't allowed to do anything that would make me sweat for 7 full days. . . wow . . . for someone that works out 6 days a week, that was torture! Living in S. Texas, you can't even step foot outside for more than 2 minutes w/o breaking into a sweat!! In addition to this, I couldn't go grocery shopping, or be around the general public. My hubby and I had to have separate bedrooms for the week, and couldn't sit next to each other on the couch. So my Labor Day weekend was no fun at all! I had some minor side effects from the radiation like lack of energy, a face full of zits, and a mildly sore throat, but it's over now, and I'm back into my normal "routine", thank goodness!

I've continued to stay Whole30 compliant, and am still having fun finding and preparing all kinds of new recipes. One quick note regarding the Whole30 - Recently, Melissa and Dallas agreed that using 100% cocoa in moderation was "ok" as long as it was not used to feed a craving or to substitute for "candy" (See "The Great Cocoa Debate" for more details). . . so I thought I'd give it a try. . . NEVER AGAIN!!! Here's what happened:

I found some Ghirardelli 100% Cacao Gourmet Baking Chocolate "nibs". They came in a black zip-top bag and looked kind of like flattened out mini kisses. They were completely unsweetened with the only ingredients being 100% Unsweetened Chocolate. A 16g serving (approx 18 pieces) provided 80 Kcal, 8g fat, 5g Carb, 2g Fiber, 0g Sugar, & 2g Protein. I thought to myself . . "Hmmm. . well, I finished out 30 days of the whole 30 and am around day 45 now . . I think I've banished my sugar demons for good. . so I'm going to pick these up, pop them in the freezer, and maybe sprinkle a few nibs in my fruit salad in the morning every now and then." HA!!! Boy was I wrong on SO MANY FRONTS!!!
  1. Apparently, I have NOT banished my sugar demons 100%.. . at least not in the presence of chocolate in any shape or form

  2. "Every now and then" turned into every single morning, and then multiple times a day . .

  3. "A few nibs" turned into a full serving. . . initially once a day, and then . . well . . you can guess where it went from there. . .
I started by mixing in 5 little frozen nibs (yes I counted) with some blueberries, strawberries, almonds, unsweetened coconut flakes, and a splash of coconut milk in the morning. This was REALLY YUMMY, and fully Whole30 compliant, and really nutritious as well. But when the chocolate hit my tongue, it awakened this monster inside me that I thought I had banished. . . and I craved more chocolate for at least 2 hours. I caved and had a few nibs after lunch . . and then recognized that I was doing just what I was NOT supposed to be doing - using these things as a crutch for my cravings which I thought I had done away with. The next day I found myself mixing some nibs in w/ a Tb of Natural Raw Almond Butter. . . Oh Crap . . It was oh so good. . . but OH SO BAD for me mentally.
Long story short, after three days of fighting with myself every time I walked by the freezer, I threw that bag away and took the trash bag not only outside, but all the way to the dumpster at the curb to prevent myself from digging it back out. . lol. . yes, I love my chocolate!
Moral of the story? For me personally, it is not a good idea to add Chocolate in any shape or form back into my diet. I'm not in the slightest "blaming" the Whole30 crew for their decision to allow it - I think that there are plenty of people out there who could use it in moderation as a supplement and spice to a healthy diet (similar to how I use cinmamon, cumin, tumeric, etc). I just happen to NOT be one of those people, and can recognize it :) So no more chocolate, Cacao, Cocoa, or whatever for me. . .
On to more pleasant things in life - -

I'm planning to max out my lifts later this week once some of my soreness has gone away. . . taking a week off definitely took it's toll on me! But I'm almost back to "normal" again :) I'm really looking forward to re-assessing where I stand and continuing to move forward in my journey to become stronger and more athletic :)
**Additional Note Added Later**
One more thing that I thought I'd point out regarding my mental/physical reaction to the cacao. Over the last week, my face has broken out horribly - I've got about 4 monsters on my chin/forhead (you know, the kind that HURT and are deep as hell?!?!), as well as a bunch of little "under-the-skin" bumps. Initially, I contributed this really bad breakout to the radiation therapy that I had done. I assumed that I had swallowed a pill that effectively had POISON in it, and the breakouts were a result of this poison working it's way out of my system. . .and that may very well be the case. However I think it's also worth pointing out that the breakout also occured at the same time that I was trying to experimentally re-introduce 100% Cacao into my diet. I know that it's supposedly an "old wives tale" that chocolate makes you break out, however in the past I always seemed to break out when I'd eat more chocolate than normal. . . . so it could be that this breakout is a result of the radiation therapy, or it could be my body's reaction to the chocolate. . . or mabye a little bit of both. I'll never really know for sure, but I thought it worth pointing out!

Friday, September 03, 2010

Recipe: Curry Beef & Cabbage

I am so proud of myself! I've never considered myself a "cook" because I'm not very creative in the kitchen. I can follow a recipe pretty well, but have never actually "created" one before. . . until last night!

This was SUPER easy, and I swear the most flavorful and satisfying meal that I've eaten in a while!

Curry Beef & Cabbage


1 lb Grass Fed Stew Meat
1 head green cabbage, coarsely chopped
1/2 Vidalia (sweet) onion, coarsely chopped
1/2 Tb Coconut Oil
1 Can Organic Coconut Milk
3 Tb + 1 tsp Mae Ploy Yellow Curry Paste (can be found at just about any Asian Grocer)
Black Pepper to taste

If you don't have Mae Ploy Yellow Curry Paste, or wanted to do this from "scratch" (why??), the ingredients on the label are: Lemon grass, garlic, shallot, salt, galanga (ginger), dried red chili, coriander seed, kaffir lime peel, cumin, cinnamon, mace, turmeric, cardamon.


Combine Curry Paste and 1/2 can of Coconut Milk over low heat. Heat until small bubbles start to form, then stir in remaining Coconut Milk.

Add Stew Meat, and cook slowly over low heat. The more slowly you cook it, the more tender it will be!

In seperate skillet, saute onions in 1/2 Tb coconut oil - cook
thoroughly until caramalized.

When Stew Meat is almost done, stir in cabbage and caramalized onions.

Add Black Pepper to taste.
Cover and cook about 5-10 minutes, until Cabbage is softened.

Remove lid and simmer a few minutes until sauce thickens up.

Note: I was tempted to add sea salt b/c I've never NOT added salt to a cabbage dish, but this dish DOES NOT NEED IT!! I promise ;)